0:00 thank you [Music] there's a high school teacher in Bolivia she was molesting somebody oh my God that's what you want this to be that's what it always is that's the JK ████ formula not not when I'm hosting don't brand us the formula if there's a teacher molestation I'm not yeah no you're not gonna with me it's like sexual assault doesn't exist oh that's cool I don't pick those articles all right it's a high school sex ed teacher in Bolivia oh okay getting warmer getting warmer getting warm she's facing termination right now because assumption something she did was she Bolivia's you did [Music] Define that word right now how do you
0:52 think of this she's so Bolivia's dude in a Bolivian that's amazing all right so she assigned she assigned homework to the male students in her class what do you think she asked him to do go home and ████ a cow that's what they do in Bolivia go home and like play with yourself yeah probably play with yourself so you get to know your Anatomy or whatever kind of close get more specific though oh finger yourself in a butthole she wanted them to bring something to class for the next day students of the class to bring a condom filled with their come oh dude I called it tie off your condom bro so what was her reason so that she could ████ IV that ████ so they could look at it baby
1:42 and this is her reasoning okay it's not gonna make sense but her reason is that she wanted to illustrate and like uh teach the class how long sperm can like survive outside of your body that's a pretty cool in order to tell girls like hey like be you still have to be careful even if the ████ is on a different thing so it's like if you're getting a pearl necklace and he's busting on your chest ladies be careful that ████ is still it's still live around it's active yeah that was her like lesson plan she couldn't just ████ said that she could have just said that instead of bring your comes I'm gonna but how was she gonna even prove that it's still alive we don't know because it didn't get that far and now suddenly every guy's got to think to himself let me bust in this condom and then I gotta like tie it and ████ put it in a Ziploc bag like what the ████ what's the way that she was expecting it to happen
2:32 no then you cut you cut the condom and then you get the little slide the microscope slide you take the little give me a little Petri stuff oh yeah yeah and then you put on the slide you put the other one on top of the microscope and then you look but you gotta first get the little like turkey turkey juicer and the baster the mini baster and is it even sanitary like they don't even know how to do it right you're just going to school with a bag of ████ come yeah literally and it's weird because like it's only homework for the guys so it's like I think I would be more mad about that but it's okay it's so sexist you guys okay you know what though I'll be like what the girls don't get any homework you know when you do that as a kid that's a sweet assignment that's the first place your mind no the girls have work they have to help the guys yeah group project Lab Partners Lab Partners good teacher you're a good teacher dude equal opportunity uh man I don't know you know
3:23 what would be homework like great homework the guy has to help the girl so they know how to make them come oh cool hey just I hope we get to choose sir and we don't get randomly assigned yo okay what would that happen if you were in high school if you were in high school and your sex ed teacher did say all right guys this is the homework don't ████ tell anybody I want you to just pick a partner and just make them come oh and then do a full report and keep your mouth shut God damn it would you guys do it or would you go Mom I'd get the worst luck because I always came late to class so all the groups would be paired up and I'd be sitting there and I'd get like the ████ I would get the teacher I
4:13 don't have a partner Joe I'd get the guy that didn't get picked yeah there's 16 boys and 14 girls in the class and I I get the dude that didn't get picked and it's like I guess you're my partner dude meanwhile he's putting on latex gloves like this ████ well yeah you might have the softest hands would you guys rat your teacher out hell no nah I like cool teachers I'm not gonna say a ████ word remember I told you about my sex ed teacher in Cypress College there was like a sex ed teacher who's like a white lady she was very old but kind of looked like a MILF porn star for like Elder porn Okay and then she she would always like uh first day of school right she would said she said uh you know if you guys just want to start jerking it in the middle class I really have no opposition to that and then everyone laughed we were like Ah that's funny uh funny teacher and then the next day she said it again and she was like guys again if you guys feel compelled to
5:05 you know just have an orgasm in the middle class and then like less people would laugh every day she said that and then finally only she was saying it and then no one left and we were just like she just wants to see our dicks this is crazy and then she would always remind us when office hours was and like stuff like that wow we were like dude this is wild but nobody took her up on him because you know she's a little older somebody somebody had to yeah or everybody was and just lying about it yeah I wouldn't do that works every three semesters makes the teachers do some wild ████ man I had a Drama teacher at UCLA that was pretty crazy like she would just like so she was like this older like white lady and then she would as she's like talking about the class with her she would just start ████ walking around the classroom and then she would just like go like like sit in like like students laps and like
5:55 and then she'll just start talking about the syllabus she was like oh you guys understand what the project is just like crazy ████ like that I could I could almost understand how that might but you also kind of go I understand kind of understand like it's in the scope of this art or create yeah if it was a math teacher I'd be like there's a problem here yeah yeah so for that it's like how much is that is is for her pleasure yeah and how much of that is actually getting people used to like this environment being comfortable like on a stage or something you know you know what I'm talking about you where you you know this DVD no I only know that because I remember like in early 2000s I remember like your friends were ████ joking about this DVD okay so basically we had we had a class at
6:45 UCI called sociology 69 right social 69 it's it's like basically real mature or UCI or actual sex class right but it was in one of those ████ Auditorium like a big Hall it's a huge class everybody as an elective like people always want to take it because it's just really fun right yeah super easy and then one of the weeks out of this 10-week course they have like spankies uh come in to like display like toys and like DVDs and stuff and just talk about the adult industry sponsored by them me and my homies from from ████ cadc we're always in the back just like sleeping and ████ right because we always have like rehearsal and stuff and then I remember Spanky's comes in and then suddenly they're like we're gonna get our free DVDs so they start chucking these DVDs and I'm literally like ████ halfway past on the back and one and way in the back like that last row and this thing just hits me in the chest oh ████ right and I
7:35 pick it up and it's just right on the corner right it's cracking up because he knows what I'm talking about and it's ████ it's called it says all pissed off Volume 14 and it's just girls just ████ peeing everywhere ████ all pissed off today that's wild now as as college kids though you know like this is great this is like this is not Jack on the show but this is great party material so we for sure brought it home and I swear to God that's why he's cracking up almost like every other party just in the middle of a party when it would get like really people are just drunk and Randomness is going on suddenly the TV would turn on and just people would be being all pissed off volume four four or fourteen I remember what it was wait so are they peeing it's literally just like old school porno stuff like cameras like slowly coming in and somebody's just
8:25 like getting ready to urinate and then they're literally just like open them to themselves and just like oh it's just a girl chugging all kinds of water this every scene is people just peeing everywhere what if all the giveaway DVDs are the ones they couldn't sell yeah so that's why they're just like you get ████ Mick sucking you get peeing you get Cocker and so it was like oh I want the caca one one oh yeah executive producer yeah I just remembered I remember the cover so well because that ended up in one of the houses I lived in like uh I just saw it and then it was it's like you know those like low rider models that just have their ass to the camera like this and they're squatting it was that but just hella piss coming out oh my God it was the cover and I was like was it like yellow what is this yeah it was like real piss oh man that's funny and for
9:16 context that's just to catch up me and Ryan um we had like when I was living in one house basically all those roommates they ended up living with Ryan the next year at the next house but I I graduated um so like they we inherited the DVD collection school right we had the same like circle like the circle of friends like a Venn diagram so then the dorm situation it was just houses that we were all like renting rooms yeah yeah yeah yeah we're connected by all pissed off I haven't thought of that in like like decades I haven't thought of it so I was like do you remember all this just remember everyone was laughing because they were like there's 14 of these possibly more possibly more because for sure more dude yeah they've won every six months EP is R Kelly dude is very successful
10:10 [Music]
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