0:00 what if Toyota had a commercial that said like Prius the choice car for the gay man of America would we would everyone just like sell their car dude people would leave them that yeah everyone knows that's the Ford Fiesta a seat contoured for your gay ass [Music] you guys know about the Bud Light controversy right yeah yeah and right now do you support you're no not is that it's not the fact that they support transgender but it's the fact that they were like kind of forcing it down people's throats of like you gotta ████ like this campaign because you because you're stupid rednecks or whatever yeah you're stupid ████ redneck idiots that's what this is stupid rednecks why don't you like transgenders hey why don't you take a
0:51 break from ████ your sister and go get a cold one yeah they're saying and and so there's a car and they're just like actually I don't have a problem about transgender but if you put it that way that would have been well received yeah yeah but so it's so stupid there's a dust up about that obviously uh Bud Lights uh CEO has come out and said that with all the talk on social media about how Bud Light is ████ you see like a bunch of fridges full of Bud Light and people always taking pictures of fridges full of Bud Light they get all the coolers they're going like see yeah everything is good I made a change um the Bud Light CEO says there's only been a one percent drop in global sales even though they're stocks Plumbing there's tots ████ dropped like billions of recovered already it kind of did it kind of like a v-shaped recovery
1:42 people bought the dip dude we have a lot of Alcoholics and a lot of Alcoholics were just hooked on their brand and in their they tried Coors and they're just it's not the same and then they had to go back to Bud Light I think alcoholics drink PBR though yeah really yeah because the cheapest Jeffrey Dahmer drank it he did yeah and he was a massive alcohol I'm not a huge fan of PBR I'm not gonna lie really I love Natty Ice no I'm just kidding I almost threw up saying that yeah crickets crickets that is a bad dude but I used to do a little hack when I went to improv parties is I would not want to drink Natty Ice but it was the cheapest thing to bring you have to bring something so I would bring Natty Ice in a drink cool hack and then you'd go who brought this ████ let's bring it to ████ daddy ice huh so that's the update that
2:32 it's just down one percent it's down one percent and the um the CEO he's basically reacting to the backlash because there's a hell of coverage on YouTube especially get won't go broke is like the title of all these videos Everyone loves this ████ right um conservatives are basically saying hold the line right hold the line like we got them right where we want them that's great um I can't do it I miss my Bud Light it's interesting though that they ended up sort of being caught right in between like because of that how there's like conservatives are like oh you guys ████ up but then Liberals are like you haven't doubled down right so it's like both sides are like upset yeah but didn't they just give them a lot of publicity and then the people in the middle that just don't give a ████ they're like I think a lot of people really just don't give a ████ just buy it exactly a ton of people do
3:23 not give a ████ yeah and even if you did give a ████ a little bit you know I can't believe they did that while you're ████ drinking your Bud Light yeah and you're just laughing about it like all that they did that yeah I think it's just interesting because it's like I can't believe that guy's wearing a ████ dress I'll never buy Bud Light again is that it you could make a squeeze it bottle shaped like a dick I will chug that thing yeah that's what Bud Light should have done is they should have made dick-shaped cans after that we ate thick flavors chips here and then how do you take yourself so seriously that you're like I ain't drinking no dick shape can you know what I mean like that yeah then Bud light's kind of like digging in on it I will say though all the cans are regular cans and there's one dick-shaped can I don't know if I'm specifically going for the dick-shaped camera speak for yourself you don't know that but we know you better than you know when the salivation starts you have to this is true their campaign should have been their campaign
4:13 should have been RP are so good that you'll suck a dick for it that's right and then it's a dick shape oh that's good Klondike bar right what would you do for a Klondike card all right and the guy's like I was straight but now I'm gay because I wanted and then and then at home you're like damn I gotta try these clothes I don't see what the hype is about I don't even know I was a dessert guy and now I'm a full raging homosexual I'm married to a man I've made you a minute not much of a sweet tooth one snack like a shadow in between meals snack but remember as a kid though like Klondike bars like we couldn't my mom didn't get them for us like because it was gonna make you gay or whatever yeah yeah probably but she just was like nah you guys don't need that junk but then the whole time you're like ████ I want to know what the hype what would you do for a contact bar
5:04 should we get some contacts huh they're bombs I like the dark chocolate one they are really good what what's what I just love it dude I love the idea that some guy just really wants dessert and now he's made to a man he's adopting kids yeah and he knew mistake he's like I'm gonna I gotta file a bunch of paperwork the only way he can get Klondike bar I could force my wife I'd even buy it yeah dude he won't buy it I gotta contact this U.S census like I don't know a gay dude lives in this house what would you do for a comeback boy but he's just like I just want to know what the chocolate vanilla or like the chocolate coating my wife said no dessert it's the perfect square there's just too much about this that's funny so
5:55 it's hard to take anything it's hard to take anyone's rage seriously I don't understand getting pissed about this I literally do I've tried to put myself there it's like what are you really mad about the only thing that's dumb is the fact that it that it was a big Panda move but everything is in Market exactly what's not you know maybe that's it you really like deep down your hearts of heart so you love Bud Light and then you saw that commercial piece of ████ is getting fired up it's a Tim Robinson sketch you're like what the ████ and then for like two weeks you're just like you're complaining about it you're talking talking about it but then when in your like when you're alone time you're just like ████ ████ like we want a Bud Light what if Toyota has a commercial that said like Prius the choice car for the gay man of America would everyone just like sell their car dude people would leave them that would be hilarious though
6:45 everyone knows that's the Ford Fiesta a seat contoured for your gas let me just go oh I guess it is you're not gonna duel and seats are a little different yeah you got a rear view mirror to look at your boyfriend's in the back seat you're gonna be in the backseat too huh voice recognition that will recognize your list I'm so dumb uh do you guys remember when uh Balenciaga did that campaign and they had like oh the child stuff yeah the child stuff and then afterwards people started like taking their Balenciaga and like throwing it out or like burning it or random ████ like that now they're out fifteen hundred dollars
7:40 the kind of societal response via social media to like stand buy something because it's such a I don't know it's such an individual Choice sometimes you know what I mean like I wish I can understand again if brand for real was like explicitly about like child labor or sexualization then you're like okay well this is not a good look but even if somebody like Toyota was like Prius is like the the choice for gay people everywhere and you had a Prius yeah it's like it would be so impractical to be like dude I'm hetero so I can't drive this car anymore you know what I mean it's such a I don't think I don't think that's true I think you would have to sell it if you're a hetero dude it might be more expensive because all the gays want to buy it that's true the value I've always wanted if something's made for gays and you know
8:30 it's good yeah the idea that like before right so before they did they do these commercials with American flags and Clydesdales and for Bud Light and ████ yeah and like the idea that like I'm a truck driver or something and I'm watching that ████ and I'm just ████ ████ yeah brother I know I'm being sold to it all time so I don't know why people just get all ████ exactly they were doing it prior yeah yeah but you know what's funny though too is like okay it's one thing to be like okay I'm a big fan of Bud Light they did this I'm mad at them I'm not gonna drink their beer but then it's another level if you're like a guy like say Kid Rock right this dude puts out his ████ bud light on a table and then let's start shooting it up and then he posts that he films that post that put it on his Instagram you're like dude you're a grown ass man like what the ████ are you doing taking a video of
9:20 yourself shooting up a whole bunch of Bud Light and then putting on Instagram I think I think for him it's it's kind of like if you're fandom already thinks that way then you're really preaching to the choir and riling them up like that's your people you think this is Kid Rock's fault on the on on the conservative side he has to call him texting that one song and I want to be a cowboy so I always refer to him as text as white white knowledge yeah dude I gotta listen more Kid Rock what do you know about Kid Rock absolutely nothing I do not like any Limp Biscuit facts right he's more of like a rap country guy yeah yeah I mean he was he was previously of straight up rapper yeah in the 90s he had a flat top and
10:10 was just all rap yeah that he integrated that with this guy I know because I had his rap card the idea that I'm walking down like a New York City street and I see a guy dressed like a ballerina and I'm like you're shaking your pissed out I can't get there yeah I can't get there I'm sorry not yet maybe I need to watch more propaganda yeah yeah would you flip out if if um like what if you like Capri Suns like what if they had to stop Asian hate flavor did you lose your ████ stop what would the flavor be though it tastes like egg rolls Nations hate on your taste buds what do you think of that how's you know what I think I don't really respond well to like marketing campaigns but I think
11:01 I'd respond well to that I think I might I might get some buy-in from me I don't think it's gonna make Capri Sun taste any different like it already tastes like that too it already tastes like it's stopping Asian egg yeah it still tastes the same it doesn't matter what cause it has yeah especially if I'm a frequent user of Capri Suns yeah I'm still buying dude I'm picking up what they're set one [Music]
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