0:00 I'll give you phonetically the Asians okay yes Vietnamese [Music] welcome back to another amazing episode a careful boys today we have Jesus [Applause] baby thank you guys man yeah you're getting a little nasty last time huh you rip it too hard I'm Teresa dude I haven't stopped bumping Teresa Tay ever since dude fat girl did you guys re-watch that episode with the music I watched it I watched it my girl judge me the whole time they're like do you have to be gross I was like what are you talking about this is me baby you cut it off leave it
0:51 in there and ████ cut it off that's pretty ████ grossful I've never been to your stand-up shows uh yeah she's but she's like does she laugh at your job you know what it is dude she laughs at the guys that I'm like whack and she's just like he's funny is there can you say your names oh dude this guy named Jason is it because she knows your jokes because she's hurt a thousand times no no no no it's her style is different than my style even like bro like that's the worst like Christmas movies and you're just like this is so who is this for who's it yeah who is this for it's for her dude it's for her what are her favorite movies dude she watches like comedy movies those is one about the uh Lindsay Lohan the recent one the Christmas freaky Fridays not another recent one that was on Netflix exactly nobody ████ watched it but it's new
1:42 she was just like it was new it was on Christmas I didn't know she was in a Christmas movie she's a big long hand and she hits her head no she just like watches anything and she wakes up to someone else now yes you watched it she wakes up at Santa Claus yeah dude so she wakes up doesn't know who she is she falls in love with the like the guy who's broke was trying to you know make and she was in love with the guy with the money you know typical ████ sounds like you liked it a little bit it was interesting I was I was like crying at the end yeah talk to your heart emotional sure um but Liz and Lohan always makes me ████ rock hard so yeah I was like let's watch it but you still got it glass is the cheesiest ████ things is it hard to pick movies with her based off oh yeah yeah you know I I try watching like the real like edgy ones and she's like what like what's the edgy one like an edgy one like let's say
2:32 sicario or something no Pineapple Express like an easy funny that's edgy that's edgy too what the ████ she's like they're just smoking weed and just you know I'm just like but this is ████ ████ the craziest funny it's like yeah but it's like she the ones like that love actually yeah it's like I don't know it was rom-coms is she like friends you know what movies you like what and I ████ hate it was the one with the with um that Siri he falls in love with Siri no no no the comedy one it's called jexy jexy or Jackson there's a comedy here's a good movie her's a great movie yeah I could see how that came she thought it was a comedy her was deep yeah it was a I was just like it was a bummer of a movie I could see how this can you know be a thing
3:23 wait this ████ this yes yes that's the one dude that's the one jexy she likes movies like that I watched it and I was like I know this is the worst and she was like I love with Adam Adam DeVine does she like Adam Sandler movies is he really yeah based off the cover I can tell you I'm not gonna like that movie it's the cheesiest corniest comedy that you're just but it's sweet I've skipped that on an airplane it has to have like a lot like a feel good she loves those feel good I need someone dying yeah yeah she need deaths I tried watching like uh hey she's cool she's in it somebody but I tried watching like uh like drug dealer movies with her and like I love it those are fun oh dude she doesn't like gangster movies that's a true story is that into the drug scene what about Ozarks is she like Breaking Bad how's Arkansas
4:14 she loved Breaking Bad oh what she like Breaking Bad but then she was like hold on check this out she's like Breaking Bad but then at like the last last season last episode she was like um or last season she was like no it's too dark but that was the best but you watched the bridge yes yes dude yes exactly dude the buildup was there we're ready to go I'm ready to I'm re-watching this so I'm like dude this last season's gonna get even better she's like I need a break it's just too much oh it's so good when he passes up to everything dude yes but then she doesn't want to it's been a month okay we like finish this you guys watch like ████ eight seasons of it but she's done she's like I'm over it my wife did that to me oh she would have wanted it by that time people should want him to
5:04 get away I don't even like a show but I've watched it that much now I invested yeah that's like walking dead yeah it's been dead but I had to keep going you gotta see what happens right oh so you were like in it even though you didn't like it I was just like all right how long they were still fighting the governor like what the ████ because you wanted to see where it would lead right I needed to finish you're that simple already yeah I'm In Too Deep Walking Dead was the one that I was like I talked so much ████ about it that I just my pride wouldn't let me yeah why did you talk ████ about her because I was like I'm the type that's like if you like if everybody likes something I'm like ████ that yeah I was late on Taylor Swift I'm barely getting on her right now how about Game of Thrones how about Game of Thrones dude the game of you did it though I was in it when I had cable and I you know I was a little bit broke
5:57 so then I cut it off so I stopped watching Game of Thrones but I was in it oh but then I stopped and then things started getting good you know what I mean so then I started picking it back up right right with like the last season was your lady into it I was like rushing it she was into it but I wouldn't know her at the time all right you gotta admit right now the ████ that you were like I'm too prideful to watch because I already invested saying no too much but you actually like what would it be what would it be something that I talked so much ████ and then you actually like I really liked it's got to be friends really yeah Brands I talk so much fun to whack it's corny I don't get it the writing is actually really good but then every like you know I'm on the hotel rooms all the time like from doing shows I'm on the road and then it just comes on I'm like [Laughter]
6:50 ████ Ross gets me every time dude stupid ass Ross I like that with Seinfeld when I was younger I thought it was so dumb did you hate it when The Simpsons was over like why did you hear the bass guitar you're like but now it's so freaking good it's really good we're just too young to understand yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah oh what's what's up what's a young movie I mean what's the movie that you watch Young and you watch it now you're like this movie is so so oh yeah I'll tell you what that messed me up was hook hook is hilarious cook is good you didn't like it as a kid I mean as a kid you're like you liked it but you didn't get the all the jokes yeah as an adult it hits really as an adult when you watch some of these ████ hits as an adult you watch these moves you're like because he's an adult he's an adult in it so now you're watching it as people
7:40 wow it's pretty cool it is it's really it's a good one dude you'll catch all the jokes that Robin Williams was saying like even at the dinner party and stuff you're like I don't know oh yeah because as a kid you're only like focusing on the physical stuff yes yeah like when he calls him a nearsighted gynecologist yeah I got a lawyer it's like dude as a kid you're like what but now I'm like oh hilarious not that kind of lawyer yeah ████ funny all of his jokes hit so hard now that's true yeah dude ████ Rufio huh I know that's the matter everybody loves Rufio did it really yeah yeah he's always here roof oh really yeah oh dude I just started following him on Tick Tock he kept going like residual checks and I was like oh yeah yeah he's like 10 cent checks for hook I tripped out of how
8:30 many things he was on I'm like oh yeah he was in a lot of stuff especially back then what is he what kind of Asian is he looking though Filipino Filipino no ████ oh you're Filipino do we like Filipinos what's going on let's decide right now this guy's at a bunch of ████ too really not like that I always see you randomly in like either in credits or on credits or in the audience you know I was telling you oh wait that's right so I was watching a Bill Burr's like a comedy thing and then uh it panned to the audience and I was like oh yeah dude that's a credit dude it's like no no but you're in some credits too dude that's ████ crazy you're in just random like ████ all over what credit is he is I was making some kids movie or something did you do some music or oh yeah I did do
9:20 yeah what'd you do I do like kids stuff see who are you dude Ryan's so mysterious dude the children I love it it's funny if Ryan uses that as like you can read the girl over it's what's special I was like oh my God he looks yeah that's me it is who you think it is real quick it says my girl gets free tickets to things like that because she's an influencer so they always try to get her to go to sleep I don't get no tickets like that I'm always like I'm gonna go I want to go [Laughter] yeah dude those influencers get invited to all kinds I know I try to get him by this stuff no we don't we don't even get invited to the regular influencer ████ we also don't get invited to all the
10:11 Asian ████ and the Asians be doing hell what the Asian Woods go out of their way tonight they have ████ what is the ████ what's that one they invite us sometimes but we always say we're out of town they got some galators they send us to the wrong email and then they do the gala ████ they do the gold house gold house yeah well we say we're out of town yeah dude I mean stop inviting I'll come in town I don't mind but there's something cool what's what BART wants to get invited just to tell them no oh you get up we get off on that you just want the you just want to feel like you're a part of it it's gonna be part of the Asian Community a little bit do you do a lot of Mexican Community stuff dude well you know should have buried an Asia then yeah I get invited to all kinds of like Mexican things dude do you perform at Quinceaneras I don't I don't perform
11:01 dude yeah hey dude shoot out the gate guys I'm trying to think of all the the Mexican things I've been to yeah you think he's a mariachi band or what you think I'm out here playing the guitar you think I know Mariachi even though I do he's like are you one of those guys El Torito yeah dude any other Mexican questions you want to ask him no I don't know at the party by the way Jack Black it's a pass bro for doing that oh ████ he's like yo it should be canceled like for one for making a great ████ movie yeah dude dude and by the way he did cosplay Mexican he said he was half German there you go oh that's what he said in the movie
11:55 he's not Mexican but he grew up in Mexico it's like yeah he gets a pass that happens in real life too ethnically Mexican wait hold on dude I've got character go back to you guys didn't get invited to that whole premiere of the crazy Rich Asians nope for like everybody oh wait we did we went to that one we did oh we're gonna say oh cool that's pretty coveted I'm talking about covet after oh okay just like two years ago you guys off the guest list huh once we became pro-gun I think like oh ████ dude pro gun huh never mind political huh yeah I just don't think we're big enough no I see some small ass influencers there like who yeah Point them out dude what are their names dude like I don't know 10 000 followers hey
12:52 hey any race what race do you think Chinese did Chinese and they get canceled you would you play a Chinese guy oh yeah ████ yeah please play a Chinese guy dude I will know to write a movie about like that I go to China and you were born there yeah yeah I was born there and I'm just actually accent here's your line read it hungry wait wait hurry up oh hurry up and buy this guy you gotta do it come on you should just be real that's what you should be I don't know how's he accidentally it depends on which Asian you know what okay can I say something about ages can I say something yeah it might be a little racist yeah I have to cut this out let it out let's go you
13:43 might agree with you make this part louder what's with the moans the moans like there's a lot of yeah oh that might be like Korean stuff I don't know if it's created every Asian I met does a little Cantonese [Music]
14:42 which Filipino that's true and the Japanese is interesting because there's two I like Japanese either though you see I like that or I like that Sweden and let me tell you that and that's my favorite porn by the way so you watch your mouth very they're very like there's only two I'm not supposed to be here killing themselves they're so cute yeah okay so who's who's this guy who's this because I've been around this guy and I don't know who the ████ he is or
15:33 what he is but he was my neighbor and he'll go Vietnamese Vietnamese version of Vietnam are you breathing that language and I'm like he was ████ with me I was like get the ████ out of here he was ████ his mom and his mom was replied I'm like oh this is a thing okay this is the thing this bit is going prettier [Laughter] I'm like no close no Cambodian sounds super difficult yeah [Laughter]
16:24 but I'm glad you guys dumb it down for me you know yeah yeah just so you know very confused pretty accurate yeah it's pretty good you're kind of you're you're actually very spot on I would say so so who's like the elite Asian who thinks they are or who they oh yeah who thinks they are is different that's two different in the Latino world there's a lot of that too is it Mexicans or no is it Argentina well argentinians think they think they are this is world of One World Cup too oh they think they're very did win the World Cup they're they're winner did win though let me tell you about Argentina's like love anything they think they're classy they're better they're like we're white adjacent yeah they're just very loud there's also a lot of Nazis that ran away from Germany and went to so they are they that they're that's where the superiority complex white enthusiasts it makes sense yeah this is true but you
17:14 know and but I feel like as far as I in my opinion I feel like Mexicans are the ones that are like we're just the most proud March I think we're still manages by numbers I think by numbers well it's a high population I think so I think like that about if you see the land world I think it's just like oh there's a bigger diaspora you're more Mexican everything is Mexican like if you see a Latino everybody speaks Spanish they think oh you're Mexican yeah oh you're Mexican nobody says orange Argentinian or girl you think that's only here in the US or is that everywhere where why I think I think my opinion is I think Mexicans have like is it the Mexican-American complex I think so I think maybe because like we just put ourselves out there more and the people there's a lot more more than they see like Colombians or like but now it's changing I think the east coast is
18:05 different that bad bunny like now that bad Bunny's out yeah but I bet the East Coast Puerto Rico everybody's all about poor Puerto Ricans are hot yeah because the East Coast the East Coast got the Caribbean blacks and the Mexicans Caribbean Mexicans who's actually on top in actuality who's daddy right now I want to say it's not Costa Ricans I want to say it's Mexicans do it it might be right we're just running the game I think I think we're running the game because you guys got like Mario Lopez you got Canelo you got a lot of people that are like yeah who else you guys got do you think Brazil but Colombia like I don't know I think it's like but do you think Brazil fall like even though they're Portuguese speakers are they in the same or they're
18:56 like we're Brazilians yeah Brazil's are kind of weird right right because you're like are you Latino because they are Latino right yes but they speak like mother ████ yeah Portuguese some other ████ somebody you can catch like a little bit of Spanish what does Portuguese sound like I'm telling you they're women sounds like city of God with Asians you would say Korea is the one that thinks they're on top what's the one that's really on top right now I think they actually are on top I think they manifested that Destiny can I tell
19:46 you what it is I think China's emerging I'm gonna give you my thing my theory okay I don't know much Jesus Asian thing but I think my Asian Theory and don't get mad dude I think it's I think it's Japanese and number one whoa I know I know hold on I'm going by GDP only okay GDP only Koreans and then Chinese I want to say my I I want to say it but what's stopping you but it's Philippines Chinese oh my God Philippines above China yeah because of break dancing look keep it going keep it going I gotta go dude I gotta go dude this is causing so much I love the new rankings you don't hear these above time the reason why is because I guess I'm here by podcasts of
20:38 people I've seen I met a ████ Discovery I'm meeting Philip that I'm thinking like oh they're like pretty badasses yeah if you leave ████ Pacquiao yeah yeah right what's going on that's what I'm seeing this is what I'm seeing I think China number one in China to me it's I'm scared as ████ China I don't know what's going on what's going on yeah dude oh what they're doing over there dude but hey someone calm down there everything hey can you come down foreign
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